@Kharzo and I went to Dvůr on Tuesday and oh god, I actually wish we did not go to the safari that day. Since I don't know of a better thread where to write this down, I decided to put it here.
We decided to take the safari truck, since we don't have a car and because the truck ride is longer than the bus ride. We both also enjoy the driver's commentary, we've always found those guys actually quite skilled. Well, until now.
We got on the truck and soon found out the driver is some old guy who's not very good at articulation. Then we realized that he has to be probably kind of senile and... not too knowledgeable.
It started with him calling the Nile lechwe "aboka". The czech name for Nile lechwe is "voduška abok", but he just went with calling them aboka. I decided to shrug it off, but not even a minute later he started talking about the marabou storks. But he said they were a kind of pelicans. He repeated it multiple times.
As our ride continued, things were getting worse and worse. He called the grey herons "little grey birds" multiple times. He also spoke about the wild mallards and geese living in the area. There were flocks of greylag geese at the pond. He pointed at them and said those were actually Egyptian geese, "the rarest kind of geese". Wow. Really.
He also said that drills are "little cute monkeys". That might sound like recession when written in english, but trust me it wasn't. And again - drills are called "dril" in czech, but he decided to call them "drila" for some weird reason.
When passing the African wild dogs, he started a strange monologue about them being the most beautiful dogs in the world and that you could probably buy them somewhere, but it would be expensive. And that they don't make good pets. Not because they were agressive or simply a wild species of canids. But because they're stubborn. And I don't think he called them "dogs" even once, he went with the word "doggies". Oh god.
Encouraging the visitors to pet and feed the giraffes at the safari was also something.
When passing the lions, he said that Dvůr has bred hundreds of them. And that they are being released into the African wild.
Oh, and if you didn't know, the Cape buffalo is the fourth most dangerous animal in the world! The only animals more dangerous than buffalos are tigers, lions and sharks.