The Nonsense Thread

The short answer is 'Yes', most animals can recognise the uniform better than faces and may approach if they want to see a keeper (particularly around feeding time). Then again, many animals may still ignore you - and ignore their keepers.

If you really want their attention, walk past their exhibit in colours like the uniform, carrying a large bucket.

:p

Hix
 
I'm going to get some big bucks, or else I'll go to jail. I love these emails. :D

-----------

Federal Bureau of Investigation
Field Intelligence Unit
J. Edgar Hoover Bldg.
935 Pennsylvania Ave NW Washington, DC 20535,
USA.

Urgent Attention: Beneficiary,

I am special agent Mark A. Morgan from the Federal Bureau of Investigation (FBI) Field Intelligence Unit. We have just intercepted and confiscated two trunks at John F Kennedy International Airport in Jamaica New York, NY 11430 coming from a foreign country.

We crosschecked the content of the boxes and found it contained a total sum of $4.1 million dollars. Also with one of the trunks were documents with your name as the receiver of the money. As we progressed in our investigations of the Diplomat which accompanied the trunks into the United States we learned that he was to deliver these funds to your residence as payment of an inheritance/winning, which was due to you.

Further checks on the consignment, we found out that the consignment paperwork lacked the PROOF OF OWNERSHIP CERTIFICATE AND LEGAL DELIVERY PERMIT CLEARANCE CERTIFICATE forms. We then confiscated both trunks and released the Diplomat. The trunks According to section 229 subsection 31 of the International ,Commerce Regulators Code Enforcement Guidelines, your consignment lacks PROOF OF OWNERSHIP CERTIFICATE AND LEGAL DELIVERY PERMIT CLEARANCE CERTIFICATE from the joint team of the Federal Bureau Of Investigation and Homeland Security and therefore you must contact us for direction on how to procure the two certificates, so that you can be relieved of the charges of evading tax which is a jailable offense under section 12 subsection 441 of the – Tax Code. We will also be asking the IRS to launch an investigation of money laundering if you do not follow our instructions.

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Regional Director
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E-mail: agm******
 
I see there appears to be trouble with the money I've sent to you. I hope Chlidonias' payment went through. I'll have to call my cousin in Nigeria to make sure.

~Thylo:cool:
 
I rather suspect it is Chli who is receiving money by dodgy means, rather than sending it out ;)
 
Both the zoos where I've worked have had Short-clawed Otters, which get excited whenever they see a keeper uniform, regardless of whether that person has ever fed them. At least two pig species are the same, primates may be more discerning.
 
nanoboy said:
I'm going to get some big bucks, or else I'll go to jail. I love these emails. :D
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I never realised your first name was Beneficiary. You must have had a hard time at school with a name like that.

:p

Hix
 
I've been around horses most of my life. They recognize me no matter what I am wearing, unlike my birds, who go into panic if I happen to walk up to them wearing a hat or sunglasses.
 
Hix said:
I never realised your first name was Beneficiary. You must have had a hard time at school with a name like that.

:p

Hix
Click to expand...

Yes it was. But be careful what you say to me because it "may lead to your arrested".

Thylo, I think Chlidonias is the Nigerian prince at the other end of these emails.
 
Double Gloucester Review

I ate some relatively expensive Double Gloucester cheese this weekend. Sommerale Classic English Cheese Double Gloucester. It was more expensive than my favorite cheddar (kind of a turnoff) and colored with annatto (which I formerly had a slight aversion to). It was from England, so it was authentic maybe, I'm American so maybe I'm easier to palm off. It was shaped like a wedge with the end cut off. It was on the mild side, solid not crumbly, with a smooth texture. It has a tangy aftertaste that I grew to like. All told I'll rate it three and a half stars out of four because I prefer sharp cheeses. Maybe it will grow on me, I sort of liked it on Saturday, found myself wanting more on Sunday, and had a craving for it on Tuesday. This is similar to how I got to liking blue cheese.
 
wensleydale said:
I ate some relatively expensive Double Gloucester cheese this weekend. Sommerale Classic English Cheese Double Gloucester. It was more expensive than my favorite cheddar (kind of a turnoff) and colored with annatto (which I formerly had a slight aversion to). It was from England, so it was authentic maybe, I'm American so maybe I'm easier to palm off. It was shaped like a wedge with the end cut off. It was on the mild side, solid not crumbly, with a smooth texture. It has a tangy aftertaste that I grew to like. All told I'll rate it three and a half stars out of four because I prefer sharp cheeses. Maybe it will grow on me, I sort of liked it on Saturday, found myself wanting more on Sunday, and had a craving for it on Tuesday. This is similar to how I got to liking blue cheese.
Click to expand...

Have you tried Stinking Bishop?.

I best describe it as a soft cheese, not too dissimilar to brie or camembert in texture, but with a slightly more creamy look, taste and gloss to it. It is probably at the moment my favourite soft cheese, although it can be hard to source regularly. Stinking Bishop is a mid strength tasting cheese, with an extremely strong smell from its washed rind. I highly recommend this cheese along with a dry crunchy cracker of you choice, a few grapes and a small glass of port to sip between bites.

Another favourite cheesy concoction that is a favourite of mine is our old friend Mr Stilton the rich blue veiny cheese. Although many people are familiar with the distinctive taste of this old English cheese, I may be new in introducing you to the combination of stilton, honey and walnuts. The slightly crumbly nature of stilton sticks well to walnuts, then drizzle on a bit of honey (to taste). Again an exquisite flavour combination for the taste buds.
 
Pootle said:
Have you tried Stinking Bishop?.

I best describe it as a soft cheese, not too dissimilar to brie or camembert in texture, but with a slightly more creamy look, taste and gloss to it. It is probably at the moment my favourite soft cheese, although it can be hard to source regularly. Stinking Bishop is a mid strength tasting cheese, with an extremely strong smell from its washed rind. I highly recommend this cheese along with a dry crunchy cracker of you choice, a few grapes and a small glass of port to sip between bites.

Another favourite cheesy concoction that is a favourite of mine is our old friend Mr Stilton the rich blue veiny cheese. Although many people are familiar with the distinctive taste of this old English cheese, I may be new in introducing you to the combination of stilton, honey and walnuts. The slightly crumbly nature of stilton sticks well to walnuts, then drizzle on a bit of honey (to taste). Again an exquisite flavour combination for the taste buds.
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I have yet to encounter Stinking Bishop in the U.S.A., so I will have to check the internet or whine for it at my yuppie food coop.

I have seen Stilton but I cannot buy it just yet because I received (along with other cheeses) a wheel of Maytag Blue as an early birthday present.

It is crumbly, with a bite. Very creamy. It has a taste you need to get used to but one you do... It is milder than gorgonzola and has yellow, blue, and green veins. It does have a slight aroma. It is made with cows milk, which I understand is unusual for blue cheese. If you get the chance try it with fruit (eg. apples, pears, oranges, grapes), with sweet cider, on a salad, pizza, or on any uncomplicated cracker.
 
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I sometimes get a weird feeling when I read about a zoo having a new exhibit that displays black-hooded nuns. I know they're referring to a type of bird, but it just sounds strange when you read it in print.
 
cleusk said:
I sometimes get a weird feeling when I read about a zoo having a new exhibit that displays black-hooded nuns. I know they're referring to a type of bird, but it just sounds strange when you read it in print.
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what about a mixed exhibit of bishops and nuns? I don't know if there's any chance of hybridisation.
 
nanoboy said:
Bishops, nuns, and tits. I've seen a few documentaries with these species already.
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I don't think "documentary" is the correct term in this case.

:p

Hix
 
Thylo - you're a pre-pubescent male. Of course I'm saying what you're thinking!

:p

Hix
 
Hix said:
Thylo - you're a pre-pubescent male. Of course I'm saying what you're thinking!

:p

Hix
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Ah, he's still so innocent - bless! :p
 
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